Possibly the best eye firming treatment gel in the world?!?!

This is one of those times that Beauty Wonkette is glad that she was too busy to sit down and post, because had Beauty Wonkette NOT been too busy and HAD posted when she was going to, then Beauty Wonkette would be correcting herself, pleading forgiveness, etc. etc.

WHAT the hell is this crazy woman going on about? you ask as you grumble under your breath that you do wish Beauty Wonkette would get to the damn point! Ok, ok - Beauty Wonkette hears ya...

Beauty Wonkette adores MLab's skincare line. In fact, the Anti Aging Serum is truly her hg, go to, just try and pry it out of my hands product. So, when the lovely folks over at MLab ran one of their 50% off specials, BW scooted over to the site, with her new hubby's amex in her hot little hand. When she arrived, she learned that MLab had come out with a new eye product (in addition to their eye cream that has been around from the start and which BW is NOT crazy about) that sounded very promising. It's called Sonic Tensor Eye Serum and it's truly supercharged, boasting that it's formulated with 72% active ingredients. That, and the fact that it sounds all space agey and reminded Beauty Wonkette that she wanted to be an astronaut when she was a mini Beauty Wonkette, AND the 50% off event (which is, sadly, over), AND the fact that the amex in her hand was her hubby's and not hers, all combined and led to a result that you have probably already guessed. Beauty Wonkette bought it.

Now, like so many of us, Beauty Wonkette seems to be on a constant quest for the perfect eye product. She's tried everything out there. EVERYTHING. For the past 18 months, she has remained (semi) faithful to Go Bare Skincare's RevitalEyez. It's lovely stuff at an unbeatable price, and also chock full of peptides, peptides, and more peptides. And, while Beauty Wonkette has strayed briefly, she always comes back to it. But, if only there was something that was just a little bit more FIRMING; something that could provide just a teeny bit more LIFT (short of duct tape, of course).

When the MLab package arrived, Beauty Wonkette raced up stairs, leaping over the dogs, and almost broke her neck because her bathroom isn't that big and, given her speed, she had trouble braking and almost slammed into a wall. And then she tried the magical new elixir. And, she exclaimed EWWWW YUCKY !!! At first blush, it felt kind of icky sticky. Admittedly, BW thought she felt some very definite tightening around her eyes, but when she looked in the mirror, she didn't see anything significant. She didn't expect to. After all, doesn't Beauty Wonkette always tell you that you have to give a product several weeks before you arrive at any conclusion? So, despite the yuck factor, which frankly isn't all that yucky in any case and which is no longer yucky about 10 minutes after you put it on, Beauty Wonkette soldiered on. Truth be told, she WAS going to post something less than complimentary about the stuff, though. She didn't though. Fast forward to today.

It has now been about 11 days since this stuff arrived. Although the bottle says to use it am AND pm, BW has been using it in the am and using her RevitalEyez stuff at night. When BW looked in the mirror today, she did a double-take! Even though BW was out partying last night and only got about 5 hrs sleep, her eyes looked incredibly OPEN. In fact, BW eyes looked so very open, due to the tightening of the skin from eyelash to eyebrow, that one just might think that some outside laser or scalpel yielding power had intervened!!! The stuff is that good. Now, Beauty Wonkette must warn you in advance - the stuff is NOT moisturizing. If moisture is an issue for you, you probably will have to use another product on top of this. It isn't an issue for Beauty Wonkette, so she's perfectly content using this alone in the morning and her RevitalEyez alone at night.

And, they all lived happily ever after. The end.

Sonic Tensor Eye Serum 95.00 USD

GBS RevitalEyez 19.99 USD

Tar Baby !!!

TAR BABY?!?!?!? WTF?

No, no - not at all. You see, Beauty Wonkette recently discovered Obsessive Compulsive Cosmetics (Beauty Wonkette would have loved this line for its name alone!)and has been playing with their products. Now, as some of you have probably figured out, BW is really not all that big on make-up, but their are a few things that EVERY self-respecting Beauty Wonkette covets - great lip products, stupendous mascara, tinted moisturizers, fine powders that make you look air-brushed.... Hehe - good thing Beauty Wonkette is NOT that into makeup, eh? But, BW does digress.

The OCC product that is BW's current obsession is called Lip Tar. It's such an unlikely name for a truly innovative and awesome product. TAR BABY - at best, it connotes a sticky situation. At its worst - well, nevermind - who wants to go to that uglee place. However, having thought it through, maybe it isn't such an icky name after all.

What are some of the words that spring to mind when you think of tar? Permanent, heavy duty, thick, a glossy surface. Are you following? Ultimately, who doesn’t want a lip product that has a glossy shine and a long lasting formula that stays put? Well, my lovelies, Beauty Wonkette introduce you to Obsessive Compulsive Cosmetics and their Lip Tar! This stuff is truly a beauty lover's dream.

A stunning new innovation in lip color, OCC Lip Tar combines the longevity of a lipstick, with the ease of application of a gloss. It goes on slick and moist, and dries down to a satin finish. Ultra-saturated in color, OCC Lip Tar contains an unprecedented amount of pigment, so a little goes a very, very long way. What you end up with is an intense, yet featherweight, layer of color that even stands up to the scrutiny of Hi-Def Video and Digital Photography, without ever looking (or feeling!) heavy. Meant to be mixed, OCC Lip Tars come in a range of colors (and black and white!) for a limitless selection of shades made by you! (Think makeup artist meets mad scientist). Just DO remember: a little bit of this stuff goes a very long way.

At $12.50 a tube, you can afford to mix madly....

Oh, yes, lest Beauty Wonkette forgets: OCC Lip Tar is 100% Vegan and Cruelty-Free, and is also free of parabens and other harsh preservatives. It is a simple, elegant formula that contains Hemp Oil, Peppermint Oil and Vitamin E. The result? OCC Lip Tar feels as good on the lips as it looks!

BOOM! chicka BOOM! chicka BOOM!

OoOoOooooppps... sorry! Beauty Wonkette got carried away for a moment. But, the truth is, finding a cosmetic line that stresses a simple "one color fits all" approach to beauty AND attaches it to an insistence that there isn't anything wrong with being over 40 EXCEPT trying to look 18, makes Beauty Wonkette WANNA DANCE! BOOM! chicka BOOM!

Ok - here's the poop (so to speak). Cindy Joseph started out as a makeup artist, then launched a successful modelling career when she decided to stop camoflaging her gray hair (uh, yeah, her long, lovely locks are gray, but I think the modelling thing worked because the woman is SERIOUSLY gorgeous), and now, she has come out with an interesting and very simple beauty line that consists of just three pocket-sized twist-up sticks, perfect for tossing in your gym bag and dabbing on-the-go:

* Boomstick Glo: A deliciously hydrating olive oil and beeswax balm formulated by Cindy’s beekeeper friend in Hawaii that can be used on cuticles, lips or face. This one deserves a spot in even the most crowded stash!

* Boomstick Color: A berry hue for lips, cheeks and eyes that flatters all skin tones. Apparently, it’s based on a shade Cindy mixed at photo shoots and used on the full spectrum of celebs and models, from Uma Thurman to Naomi Campbell.

* Boomstick Glimmer: A subtle shimmer highlighter that can be used to accentuate cheekbones, brighten up the inner corners of eyes or layer on lips for a more dressed-up look.

Talk about a streamlined routine! Listen up my fellow wonkettes! These 3 little chubby stick have proved to be Beauty Wonkette's life savers on more that one occasion. They make you look good instantly – adding color and shimmer and softening lines on the spot.

I could go on, BUT Cindy Joseph does an awesome job of explaining her line, complete with video demos of her using each of the products on her own, clean face. If you, like Beauty Wonkette, are determined to embrace the simple AND look fabulous while doing it, visit the BOOM! by Cindy Joseph site and decide for yourself.

Beauty Wonkette makes her exit, happily dancing to her singing BOOM! chicka BOOM!

Look Ma, No Water!

Even though Beauty Wonkette isn't a big sleeper, mornings around Beauty Wonkette's household can be a bit errrrrrr HECTIC (ok - BW confesses: some mornings, this place is a loony bin), and (BW confession numero dos) Beauty Wonkette doesn't always have time to wash, dry and style her hair. BESIDES, (excuse alert - but actually a true one)it's really not good to wash your hair EVERY day. And, (another excuse alert) with the time you save you could be doing something really important - like sitting down and having something that resembles a healthy breakfast (with hubby even!). Okay - time to cut the crap.

In reasonably warm weather, Beauty Wonkette has zero problems leaving the house with wet hair and letting it air dry. Yeah, sure, it looks a little "undone", but ain't that secksy??? Besides, if something more "adult" is in order, BW can always do a ponytail or a loose chignon or something. But in this freaking cold? Unless you want your head to turn into an ice cube, there is no way any of us are going out there with wet hair.

That's why we jumped at this product from Brooklyn's soon to be famous boutique skinnyskinny: organic dry shampoo. This vegan hair care product promised to leave our hair looking fresh in a matter of minutes, sans shower.

Beauty Wonkette tried the stuff (which is handmade at the Williamsburg shop btw) and was very impressed. Twas easy. Just sprinkle (or dust with a powder brush) along the roots of your hair, wait a few minutes, and then comb through. That's it, my lovelies! Done! One caveat - especially if the bulk of your wardrobe tends towards black - do this before getting dressed to avoid any loose powder falling alllllll over your Armani clad self. (ask Beauty Wonkette how she knows :( ).

This stuff is amazing. Beauty Wonkette didn't think it possible, but as promised, she was able to go three days without washing and avoided the dreaded oily yucky hair syndrome, even on days she worked out. The all-natural formula left her scalp clean and toxin-free. As an added benefit, if you're a hair tosser (yes, BW loves to toss her hair around), you'll be treated to a delightful fragrance with each and every toss. And the fragrances ARE lovely: Organic Rose and Black Pepper, Organic Grapefruit and Cardamon (Beauty Wonkette's personal fav), Organic Jasmine, Organic Lavendar and Rosemary. And, if that's not enough, these shampoos actually give your hair an awesome texture that doesn't require as much styling products to have volume. In case you haven't guessed, Beauty Wonkette is in LOVE with this stuff.

4.5 ounces will set you back $32, but it's enough to use for 3 months or more, even if you have lots and lots of long tresses like BW. Check out some of the other stuff on skinnyskinny's website. Great stuff.

Like White on Rice ! DIY haircare from Peter Lamas

Beauty Wonkette can tolerate very few products in her hair. A couple of drops of Moroccan Oil is pretty much the limit. However, recent holiday hoopla reminded Beauty Wonkette that sometimes you really do need a little more body and hold.

BW is sure you've been there. We all have. But, before you start loading gunk into your hair, here's a neat little DIY tip from Peter Lamas. If you've tried (and loved) his Rice Protein sulfate free volumizing products - and if you have tried them, chances are you love them - you'll know at least a little about why this works so very well...

To build body and create hold: Bring 2 cups water to a boil. Throw in a fistful of rice - about half a cup should do it. After just a few minutes, long before the rice has absorbed all the water, turn off and let cool. Then drain and reserve the water. Transfer the water into a spray bottle and leave in the fridge. Mist on towel-dry hair before styling.

The starch from the rice creates volume and hold that will last an entire day without leaving sticky residue. Beauty Wonkette swears. Really.

WHATTA WHITE OUT?!?!?!?!

There was a time, way back in the olden days, when Beauty Wonkette thought that pale lipstick - yeah yeah almost WWWWHITE - was just the most bitchin' thing. Beauty Wonkette makes this admission here even though she once went to great pains to destroy all evidence (read photos) of this unfortunate predeliction. So, you can imagine her shock when she encountered what appeared to be a blast from the past - a WHITE lipstick!!!!

Oh my! Would Beauty Wonkette become a victim of recidivism even after years of rehab and good grooming? Well, fortunately (or not), we'll never know.

You see, although at first glance, YSL's Rouge Pur Couture lipstick in Blanc looks like an intense opaque white, it turns out the shade is more a tribute to sheer shimmer than to '80s, frosted ice queen. When worn alone, Blanc gives a hint of slivery glimmer to lips and when layered, it mellows out super-saturated shades while also adding an extra boost of shine. Plus, the entire Rouge Pur Couture collection — sixteen shades in all — protects with SPF 15 and contains a fade-resistant base to help keep you prettied up throughout all your (ahem) winter activities.

It's carried everywhere the YSL line is carried and will set you back $30. Beauty Wonkette went for it - you might want to check it out....