Showing posts from June, 2009

Maybe you CAN catch more flies with honey than with vinegar, buttttt......

What Beauty Wonkette wants to know is why would you want to (catch yucky flies, that is)?

Besides, Beauty Wonkette likes vinegar. Apple cider vinegar makes BW's hair all purdy and shiney and it makes a damn good skin toner. Now, there is new evidence that vinegar may truly be a natural fat fighter!

Researchers in Japan are reporting new evidence that the ordinary vinegar - a staple in oil-and-vinegar salad dressings, pickles, and other foods - may live up to its age-old reputation in folk medicine as a health promoter. They are reporting new evidence that vinegar can help prevent accumulation of body fat and weight gain. Their study is scheduled for the July 8 issue of ACS' Journal of Agricultural and Food Chemistry, a bi-weekly publication.

Tomoo Kondo and colleagues note in the new study that vinegar has also been used as a folk medicine since ancient times. People have used it for a range of ills. Modern scientific research suggests that acetic acid, the main component of vi…

Assume the uhhhh POSITION....

Banish sunburns forever with the flick of your wrist.

Beauty Wonkette hears that ou've been a bad, bad girl. You've been criminally lax when it comes to your sunscreen routine.

Ohhhhhh sure, you stock up on the best lotions and potions, but somehow, you always forget to re-apply. The punishment? Sunburns (ouchies).

Luckily, Beauty Wonkette has found one accessory that doubles as your "get out of jail free" card. Just slip on the UVSunSense bracelet before you hit the beach or the pool!

Here's how it works: While you're applying sunscreen, use a dab of lotion to coat the wristband where it says "Apply sunscreen to this side." The band will turn purple, indicating it's been activated. When you've absorbed too many harmful UV rays, the band morphs to brown signaling it's time to reapply. And when the words dissappear altogether, it's time to abort your tanning mission and run for cover.

Beauty Wonkette is sooooo good to you :D. Grab these …

Put away that Dust Buster !!!

Have you ever been so frustrated by blackheads that you want to take a Dust Buster to your face and just suck them all out? Beauty Wonkette doesn't recommend doing that ( has Beauty Wonkette ever told you about the time she took a Dust Buster to her dog's ever shedding triple coat....), but BW DOES recommend a new symbolic solution from Dr. Brandt.

Pores No More Vacuum Cleaner is a 10-minute mask that helps loosen up clogged pores and extract those heinous blackheads. It uses silicone dioxide to essentially pull out debris and extra sebum, while alpha- and beta-hydroxy acids — salicylic and glycolic acids to be precise — soften and smooth. A special rose-sourced ingredient tightens pores back up when the cleansing is complete.

Beauty Wonkette loves the cooling feeling Vacuum Cleaner creates as it does its duty, not to mention the bottle-matching blue it turns while you wear it. (And, yes, Beauty Wonkette is willing to look like a Smurf for a few minutes if it means no blackheads…

Smooth operator....

You can call Beauty Wonkette demanding, but we don't want our pores to be just unclogged - we want them to be tiny, eensy-weensy, virtually invisible to the naked eye. Is that so much to ask?

Well, if you're asking Renee Rouleau, then no.

This spa-owning aesthetician has created a resurfacing cream that looks and feels more like a cream, but works more like a super-scrubbing resurfacer. Micro Crystal Cream is a gentle, dreamy exfoliator that uses super-small crystal particles to reduce pores while helping to keep them clear. As it refines, it smoothes skin into a younger-looking state, complete with less discoloration.

Beauty Wonkette loves that it nourishes and soothes as it sloughs, leaving behind vitamins and botanical extracts like ginseng, horse chestnut, lavender and comfrey.

$37.50 at Renee Rouleau

Look! Over there... It's a cream; NO, it's a concealer.....

It's Jemma Kidd's I-Rescue Bio-Complex Cover!!!

Beauty Wonkette happened upon this little gem when a bff complained that she thought she had a malfunctioning synapse in the beauty-routine section of her brain, specifically when it comes to the eye area. Apparently, when she remembers to apply eye cream, she forgets to apply concealer. When she remembers to apply concealer, she forgets to apply eye cream. She wept that she definitely needs both, so it's a rather inconvenient glitch.

Beauty Wonkette to the rescue! Fortunately for my friend and her flawed synapses, BW discovered a two-in-one wonder by Jemma Kidd, called I-Rescue Bio-Complex Cover. This tinted treatment is sheer genius! As it lightens up dark circles and sets a stable canvas for eye shadow, it also works to smooth fine lines, diminish puffiness and banish bags—not just conceal them for a little while.

It's more than makeup because of ingredients like palmitoyl oligopeptide (AKA Matrixyl) and beneficial botan…

A sad day ....


Wading through a sea of skincare...

Even though this skincare stuff is sort of Beauty Wonkette's gig, sometimes Beauty Wonkette just don’t know where to start. With products, that is; specifically, with the tidal wave of skin care that seems to arrive on the scene each month!

Each cream, serum and corrector is a little different from the next, yet they all promise something equally wonderful. But if you don’t take those promises at face value – and Beauty Wonkette absolutely does NOT – you need at least a few weeks to see if they actually work. So, how in the name of plump skin do you know what’s what?
I hooked up with two of my favorite dermatologists - one in D.C. and one in the Big Apple - to see what they had to say:

Beauty Wonkette: What advice would you give someone who is overwhelmed by the choice of moisturisers out there?
The Docs: Feel good about your choices and choose a product that’s right for right now. If your skin’s very dry at the moment, choose a thicker cream. When the weather warms up, you might go …

Fatal Extraction

Beauty Wonkette always thought one of the golden rules of skin care was that you should never do your own extractions. But according to skincare guru Liz Earle, it’s fine to DIY as long as you follow some basic guidelines:

1. Give skin a good cleanse first and only extract after a shower, bath or steam so skin is soft and easier to work.

2. Make sure your hands are scrupulously clean.

3. Always use a tissue – it’s kinder (and cleaner) on skin than bare nails.

4. Use a little plant-based oil on the area before you extract (extra virgin olive oil is a good one). It protects the skin and makes extractions easier.

5. Use a magnifying mirror or at least make sure you have plenty of light.

6. Don’t over-poke. If a black head or spot doesn’t budge after a bit of massaging around, leave it. (Think of extractions as an on-going part of your cleansing routine – you don’t have to get them all out every time but removing the worst will keep skin looking clear.)

7. Use a little antiseptic afterwards – d…

Hey all you NYC gals (and guys). Join Beauty Wonkette on a SoHo stroll....

Walk, shop and unwind all for a worthy cause? Beauty Wonkette is in! How about 'choo?

No arm-twisting needed to get Beauty Wonkette on board for the SoHo Stroll (June 11-13). With the purchase of a $20 bracelet, you'll get discounts at shops and restaurants around the neighborhood--all proceeds go to The Association of Community Employment Programs for the Homeless. There's a slew of participating businesses, but we're sold on these deals:

• Stop by Delicatessen this week between 11AM and 4PM and pick up your official bracelet along with a free Deli cocktail. Cheers! 54 Prince St., (212) 226-0211

• Coiff it up at Aveda where you can pre-book to receive 30% off any hair service. 456 W. Broadway, (212) 473-0280

• Visit the iconic tennis brand Tretorn and score 20% off all shoes and clothes. (We love their old-school classic kicks.) 150 Spring St., (646) 454-9680

• Pamper yourself with hand and arm massages and mini-facials at Molton Brown. On Saturday afternoon, the store wil…

Making up, breaking up.....Beauty Wonkette says SCR** the tabloids!

For the most part, Beauty Wonkette enjoys food shopping....EXCEPT when she makes the mistake of thumbing thru the tabloids at checkout. Beauty Wonkette cannot believe that the tabloids (as well as some blogs that will go unnamed .... GRRRR) are still
bitching about female celebrities venturing
outdoors without makeup. They're so sensational
about it, that catching Pamela Anderson without
her face paint seems to rival the fright of a Sasquatch
sighting. And it's also one of the lamest, laziest ways
to hack at female self-esteem; implying that a
woman without makeup is committing some sort of
societal crime. The endless "Stars without Makeup"
tabloid rants are a constant reminder of the
not-so-subtle sexism in Hollywood: that female star
power is only skin deep. But for heaven's sake--if
Penélope Cruz can't go to the beach without her
"face on," then there’s no hope for the rest of us. Beauty Wonkette's guess is that the editors of those rags look like crap …

Strange/Beautiful indeed.....

Beauty Wonkette is slightly obsessed with nail polish these days. Pedicures are a year round indulgence for BW, but once the warm weather comes around, that indulgence seems to become an obsession - but it's a fun one. And while Beauty Wonkette can always fall back on a few of her all time classic favs, it's always fun to find new and unusual colors. Enter Strange/Beautiful....

STRANGEBEAUTIFUL™ was inspired by the vibrant red typewriter designed by ETTORE SOTTSASS and his work with the MEMPHIS group of designers, who rejected the rules of "good taste" and functionalism, and regarded design as fashion, with outrageous style appearing for a season and quickly disappearing. Willful and provocative, STRANGEBEAUTIFUL™ library of color changes each season so you have to grab it while you can.

The first collection for included a rainbow of vibrantly beautiful colors including A Midcentury Modern Orange and An Art Nouveau Blue teal - inspired by the depths of a lake at ni…

Cool Beans

Magic Under Eye Lightener Soup !!!

Don’t you just love it when someone says “You look so tired”? Really makes you feel good about yourself. Especially when it’s your mother. Or, better yet, your facialist. (Like you pay her for that crap?)

So you can imagine the giddy thrill Beauty Wonkette got when, on a recent trip to the ever-swank Susan Ciminelli Day Spa, Susan revealed her trick. No, it wasn’t a miracle cream. No kooky facial exercises. A pill? Nope.

Adzuki bean soup.

Sound like this belongs on the shelf next to the wonder zit salve or the make-you-skinny B-12? Beauty Wonkette was skeptical too. Till one recent Sunday afternoon when Beauty Wonkette donned her toque (and little else) and made Ciminelli’s legendary stew. (Part chili, part soup — all delish!)

Three hours later, Beauty Wonkette forgot all about the dark circles.

Beauty Wonkette wonders if fava bean pate could do something for crow’s-feet?

Adzuki Bean Soup Recipe:

This special Japanese bean helps to diminish the appearance of…

Suck on this, sweetie.....

Over the years, Beauty Wonkette has come to the firm conclusion that sucking then swallowing is usually a true recipe for success.

Except, alas, when it comes to your breath.

For that, Beauty Wonkette recommends that you reverse the order with EatWhatever, a new product that truly fights halitosis in a one-two punch.

The packs come with two components: jellies and mints. After a garlicky or otherwise malodorous meal, swallow two or three jellies containing organic peppermint and parsley seed oils to fight bad breath from the inside out. Then suck on one of the mints to expedite the freshening process.

For guidance on how many jellies to pop, refer to the website’s handy menu, which indicates dosage according to the type of meal you’ve ingested.

Your mouth will be so sweet, you’ll have no trouble attracting suitors.

At that point, Beauty Wonkette thinks you’ll want to reverse the order again. (Just sayin' ;-) )

A Jaunty Raincoat for your SO....leave it to the French

( Actually, these aren't REALLY French.......)

Dear John,

Some things are tough to say in person. Like, your junk is boring. I mean, physically it excites me (well done, BTW), but it’s just so, um, beige.

Of course, you must wear a condom (sorry, you’re not daddy material). But you should liven things up with French Letter Condoms. The new penile accessories come in red and yellow, studded for stimulation, scented (vanilla or passion fruit), or with a potency ring for performance enhancement. And the shiny tinfoil-like wrapper nails the condom-of-the-future look.

The Brits behind the jaunty raincoats are into fair play: The workers on the rubber plantation receive proper wages and benefits. Not to mention the condoms are completely vegan (suck it, animal lovers).

Well, that pretty much wraps things up.

No glove, no love,
(sign your name :D)

Available online at For more information, go to

Happy happy happy happy......ahem

They say that money can’t buy happiness. Pfft.... Beauty Wonkette considers the line a total crock. Especially now that you can buy Smiley beauty products online.

French company Groupe Arthes has developed a fun and scentsational way to stimulate happiness; the Smiley Happy Therapy Line (safe to self–proscribe). Smiley is a fragrance, a “psychotonic” designed to “activate happiness” and to combat depression through scent!

Stop right there. No more rolling of those well-mascara’ed eyes! We know, we know. Beauty Wonkette was skeptical at the thought of an anti-depressant perfume, too. Of course Beauty Wonkette asked ‘Does the fragrance world really need another New Age aromatherapy product?’ How can such a hypothesis even be proven? How the heck does it work?

The Company claims “…that Smiley is the first fragrance clinically proven to activate the brain’s happiness receptors.” Smiley actually works on the chemical level to elevate your mood, so let’s break it down a bit in laywoman’s term…

Beauty Wonkette Lays Out the Welcome Matte !

For recovering hardcore kids who spent their disgruntled youth scribbling on appendages with a black Sharpie or a bottle of Wite-Out, matte nails are nothing new. Ditto who grew up but not out of their chain-wearing, head-banging ways, there’s ManGlaze, the branded bottled version of the look that got its humble beginnings at Magma, a punk and hardcore festival in Yokohama, Japan.

However, if, like Beauty Wonkette, you like the idea of a no-shine manicure (a matte polish will most definitely make even stubby digits look longer and slimmer), but fall into neither of the above categories, Knock Out Cosmetics’ Flatte collection will keep you on trend, without having to attend a Slipknot concert.

KO (READ: Knock Out) is the creation of makeup artist Mike Potter - best known for creating the hair and makeup for his longtime client and friend Karen O (front woman of the Yeah Yeah Yeahs), as well as the groundbreaking stage and film versions of Hedwig & the Angry Inch.

Potter, who had bee…

G'bye FRIZZ (and good riddance....)

Beauty Wonkette was one of the first to extol the virtues of the Living Proof NO FRIZZ line and she still swears by it. But trekking back and forth between NYC and Washington DC during the hazy, hot, and HUMID HUMID HUMID as in Amazon rainforest HUMID days of summer challenges even a great product. So when given a chance to try out the new Coppola Keratin Straightening Treatment at NYC's Louis Licari, Beauty Wonkette was more than game.

OMG OMG OMG. Beauty Wonkette will forever genuflect at the alter of this process for it is truly the answer to a frizzy maiden’s prayer. This stuff works! It closes hair cuticles, giving your hair weight, making it shinier and stronger. AND, Arsen Gurgov, Master Stylist at Louis Licari, sent a bottle to his lab for testing. Unlike some other treatments out there, this treatment has nothing to do with formaldehyde. So your hair doesn’t hang like bookends on the sides of your face. Instead, it gleams, moves and has bounce.

Here’s how Coppola’s Kera…

Recession Concession: DIY Lip Conditioner

Beauty Wonkette takes excellent care of her pout, although she really is NOT inclined to mess with the aforementioned Luscious Lips thingy. And, while Beauty Wonkette will be a product junkie forever, she isn't opposed to DIY (aka CHEAP) fixes when they work. Here's a favorite....

Mix two parts sugar with one part olive oil, and you’ll have a conditioning lip scrub that tastes as good as it feels. Massage the mixture right into your lips, then wipe (or eat) off anything that’s left. We dare you not to lick the bowl. Mmmmmmm.

Will Farrell Just Made SPF Funny!

Beauty Wonkette believes in the American System. So, although she isn't inclined to make these purchases, she has no problem when Paris Hilton hawks stilettos, Eva Mendes designs sheets, and Jessica Simpson’s business empire includes everything from fragrance to luggage. Now, who’s to say that only Hollywood’s ladies get to have their own product lines? Will Ferrell is the next celeb to jump into the branding game by stripping down and greasing up for summer with a signature sunscreen collection. Taking the adage “sex sells” to heart, Will’s three SPF 30 lotions — in Sun Stroke, Sexy Hot Tan and Forbidden Fruit — feature glamour (ahem) shots of the comedian in various states of undress. 100% of proceeds from Will Ferrell Sunscreen will benefit the charity Cancer for College’s College Willpowered Scholarship Fund, which grants college scholarships to cancer survivors and amputees. As for why he chose to continue his long-time support of the charity with sunscreen, Will explains, “…

A new way to get a sexy pout ?

A new device for plumping up thin lips is raising more than a few eyebrows, most specifically the two attached to Beauty Wonkette's face! Check this out fellow Beauty Wonkettes. Luscious Lips is a small pump that creates a vacuum seal around the mouth—by pulling the pump back and forth. According to the company that makes it, the instrument increases blood flow to the mouth, increasing lip size by fifty percent. Now, Beauty Wonkette loves the idea of a fuller, sexier mouth, but she couldn't help but notice that the instructions caution that Luscious Lips could "cause bruising in the mouth area." Beauty Wonkette asked Washington, DC dermatologist and Georgetown University professor Tina Alster to test it. "The suction irritates the lips and causes bruising," she says. "If you're looking for a painless alternative to collagen injections, this isn't it. What THIS is, my dear, is essentail a breast pump (ala the BRAVA system) for the face." …